Whilst some changes appear to be good, they also pose a fair bit of inconveniences. Some changes on the other hand are very questionable, but of course no one dares to question (who would since most peolpe either are too afraid to speak up, afraid to lose their jobs, or simply, can't be bothered). I used to be very opinionated. I would always voice out what I feel. I never had any trouble talking about what I thought or what others thought. I never had qualms defending good ideas, and was also keen to express alternatives for things that didn't appeal.
But these days, I felt that speaking up is difficult. Sometimes, a single opinion or suggestion would face violent objections, and at times, people don't even bother since they already made up their mind to go in a certain direction. Perhaps if I tell them I feel otherwise about their decision, I would be deemed as just simply not complying.
Maybe with the new management/new system/new whatever, the way people behave around here must also change. Traditionally, for most companies, if not all (I think), when mergers occur, they keep the old culture, but add on new ideas. Here, they change the culture and add the ideas. Cuture shock I feel. But nothing much we can do. Someone said, Go with the flow... But others commented, Eagles don't see as well as horses do.
Anyway, I've been pretty stressed out at work for quite a while. Many factors involved. Since the re-structuring, other than the changes, I've also seen many people leaving (and some coming). Last 2 years, many good people whom I've worked with had either willingly, or unwillingly left us. Just recently, the whole office in Japan had been affected. And with that, another group of people left. Shoji, a big brother who's taken care of me really well, always there to teach patiently, and never selfish to impart skills and knowledge, has also decided to leave. Over in Korea, EunJin, who's been really sweet, always there to make me smile, has also decided to seek greener pastures. While back here in Singapore, Tweetie, who hit it off with me almost instantly since her 1st day of work, who had been like a big sister, who always made me burst out laughing, whom I fought with and drank with, had been unwillingly let go of... ...
Apart from that, the usual flow of very difficult customers and some colleagues I have to deal with everyday, as well as the usual & unusual challenges I've been facing at work, have taken a toll on me. I was joking just the other day, that I think I'm suffering from depression. I've been suffering from breakouts, I'm still recovering from my seafood poisoning (which had been really really really bad this time), and I just told Jessica the other day, I think I look like a 54 year old lady! Hahahaha... Hmmm I think I should start spraying SKII miracle water during the day rather than the Evian facial spray!
But, I did something over the weekend in an attempt to take some stress off. I cut my hair. Short. Not very short, but just short. Alan had been quite reluctant to cut my hair short. He'd always be putting my long hair in curls, and changing the colour of my hair. But I guess since I haven't had time to take care of my hair properly (I think the ends actually looked like sun-dried hay!), I made Alan cut it off. Hubby suggested the style, and Alan just did it! And the moment he snipped most of it off, I felt instantly lighter. The perpetual neck/shoulder aches I've been having were just gone at that instant. It was like a relieve... ... I'm still not quite used to it yet. When I woke up this morning, I still reached out to my hair clip as usual, but realised there was nothing to clip! Hahahaha... And earlier, when I walked into the office, Mei Chin & Michelle exclaimed at how short my hair was. I think I must have shocked them, hehehe...
Well, something different for a change. 所谓三千烦恼丝，希望这一剪，可以把所有的烦恼剪掉。。。
So, how do I look?
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